Journal #3 – Happy EU day

So I’m going to give away all my political allegiances in this post – and it’s going to be a far cry away from making any sort of progress on fiction writing today, but I just have to get this out! (There seems to be a new genre of novels emerging about Brexit, so maybe this is relevant to the long term dream, but anyway – this is my anon space to write whatever I like.)

We didn’t leave the EU yesterday and I’m happy about it. I’m happy that MPs managed to hold back the new deal, and I’m happy that they managed to make No Deal illegal, for now at least. I’m gutted that John Bercow is stepping down, as I think he’s the saviour of democracy to be honest, and I’m fucking dreading an election.

I feel totally powerless at how awful things could become with a strong Tory majority. I hate so much of what they stand for. But I also have huge qualms about the Labour Party and the way it’s being run. I’m not a proper socialist – I don’t have a huge problem with the House of Lords, I want to send my son to a private school, I don’t hate rich people just because they’re rich, and I don’t think inheritance tax should be increased. Why shouldn’t people benefit from the hard work of their parents?

But I will probably vote Labour anyway, as that’s they most likely way to keep the Tories from winning in our constituency. Can I do anything else? Should I do anything else? I’m not going to go door knocking for the Labour party; I’m not convicted enough. I don’t think arguing online with Leavers and Tory voters is particularly helpful – and anyway, in the social media echo chamber we all live in, I mainly get fed left wing stuff in my news feed and most of my friends are much more left-wing than me. So do I sit back now for 6 weeks, stop watching the news, tune out of Facebook, and accept whatever happens?

It doesn’t feel like ENOUGH. Nothing ever feels like enough to me. I have no idea why I have this ridiculous god complex, that I have to flog myself to death saving the world. I should probably just keep my little stash of food replenished, take my kid to the park and forget about it, right? But what if Boris fucking Johnson gets a huge majority, gets in bed with the Brexiters and we are faced with Neofacism in 2020, and we didn’t do anything?

I suppose what I need to do is write a character who is grappling with this stuff and see where it takes me. The reality of course is that my one little vote won’t make a difference, my one little window sticker won’t make a difference. But not doing anything definitely won’t make a difference, so doing something is better than nothing. And THAT’S a sentence any respectable editor would harangue me about, and justifiably.

It’s also “No fun November” in our house – less booze and less treats, to pay for Christmas and for me to finally try to make some headway on the weight loss front. So happy bloody Friday, people!

At least we’re still in the EU.

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